


Hanahaki Disease Lams Ft. Thaurens

by Hamiltalian



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-24 12:30:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14954741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hamiltalian/pseuds/Hamiltalian
Summary: “Don’t die on me– Please. ”“I never meant to hurt you. ”“ I’m so in love with you. ”“I can’t stand the thought of losing you.”





	1. Lams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t die on me– Please. ”   
> “I never meant to hurt you. ”   
> “ I’m so in love with you. ”   
> “I can’t stand the thought of losing you.”

John was good at hiding his sickness, for the most part. Nobody knew about it except for his friends.. Most of his friends.

There was no way he could ever tell his closest friend, not Alexander.

After all, he was the one who caused it… John was in love with him and the fact that he didn’t love him back gave him Hanahaki Disease.

He woke up every morning coughing up flower petals and went to sleep exhausted from retching up flowers and blood. But he was good at hiding it in public, even now as he and Alexander took a walk in the park. He was great at hiding it. That is, until it progressed too far.

“Are you sure you’re alright? You look kind of pale..” Alexander asked, worried about his best friend.

John waved him off. “I’ll be fine. I’m just…” This time, he wasn’t cut off by a flower in his throat, but by the roots that had been slowly filling his lungs, passing out as the roots finally punctured them.

“John!” Alexander kneeled down and held his head in his lap. “Help! Someone call 911!” He heard someone calling out that they would do it, but John opened his eyes and shook his head weakly.

“No.. Please don’t..”

“John… What’s wrong with you?..”

A single flower petal answered his question as it floated from his mouth, Alexander immediately turning white.

“The love sickness.. Hanahaki Disease..” Even Alexander had to admit that it was hopeless if it really was a one-sided love. “John.. We have to get this out of you..”

He shook his head. “I would rather die with love than live without feeling this way for him again.. I’ll never feel a love like I do for him again, I know it. And now, I’m going to ensure it…”

“No. You’re just saying that.. You’re sick!”

“I’m not.. Ask Laf. That’s what I told him when he found out too..”

Alexander felt tears welling up in his eyes. John was going to die… He was going to die a painful death for love… “At least tell me who it is…”

John reached a shaky hand up and cupped Alexander’s face gently. “Who else?..”

Alexander felt his blood freeze in his veins. “M.. Me?..” He couldn’t have picked a worse person.

John nodded. “It’s always been you.. I’ve had this for years, ever since I met you..” He must’ve been a strong soul and Alexander knew damn well that he was. Most people only survived a year tops without surgery.

“John, listen to me. You have to get the surgery.”

He shook his head. “I’m so in love with you.. I won’t lose this..”

“Please, John! I can’t stand the thought of losing you!”

“I’m sorry..”

Alexander choked back a sob and held John’s head close to his chest. “Don’t die on me… Please…”

“You know how this ends.. I want you to accept it and I want you to know that this is not your fault.” He smiled weakly.

Alexander leaned down and kissed him softly, hoping and praying that it would work, that John would get the message, but no luck. As soon as he pulled away, John’s eyes fell shut and his chest stilled. “I never meant to hurt you…”

The crowd that had gathered quietly was now murmuring amongst each other, absolutely confused. The kiss was a sign of love, wasn’t it? It should’ve worked. There was no reason why it didn’t. It definitely wasn’t a pitiful kiss, a last desperate act to save his friend. It was full of emotion, anyone could see that. It truly seemed to be the greatest mystery.

Only it wasn’t, not to Alexander. He knew exactly why it didn’t work.

He had his blooms removed years ago.


	2. Chapter 2

It was only hours ago that John had died in Alexander’s arms..

_Alexander choked back a sob and held John’s head close to his chest. “Don’t die on me… Please…”_

And every time he closed his eyes, he saw his friend there again, accepting his death with a bravery that Alexander never could’ve hoped to have. And why? All because Alexander didn’t want to deal with the annoying flower petals. If he had just confessed… He wouldn’t be sitting outside of the hospital, the idea of being with John as they tried and failed to revive him being far too painful.

John was his best friend… And he just let him die.. He kept thinking about that as he twirled a delicate flower petal between his fingers, the only one that didn’t come out spotted with blood. He frowned at the thought and looked down, staring into a puddle as his reflection stared back at him. “You’re a monster..”

“Damn right, you are.”

Alexander’s head snapped up and his coffee brown eyes met chocolate brown as Thomas Jefferson stood before him.

“He’s dead because of you, Hamilton. There’s no denying it.”

“Did you come here just to tell me that?..”

“No.” He held up the forget-me-nots in his hand. “I came to say goodbye to him…” Thomas and Alexander may have been enemies, but John was a good man and a mutual friend to the pair.

“So, no empty threats? No ‘I’m going to kill you’ or whatever for this?..”

Thomas shook his head. “No.. This may be your fault, but you didn’t do it on purpose.. I know that much..” He sighed and reached for him. “He’d want us both-”

“Don’t touch me.”

Thomas frowned. “John would want us both there…”

“No.. I can’t.. I’m sorry.” Alexander buried his face in his hands, hiding his tears and his shame. What kind of man couldn’t even say goodbye to his best friend?

Thomas sighed. Alexander felt guilty, he knew that and understood that. He knew he had reason to and did blame John’s death on him, but this wasn’t about him. This was about John. “For John.”

“I can’t..”

Thomas shook his head and walked past him, into the hospital and up to John’s room.

Poor John was barely clinging to life, forced onto life support so that his loved ones could say their goodbyes.

It was so hard seeing him like that.. Thomas took a deep breath and walked to his side, placing the flowers on the nightstand. “Hi, John.. I’m sorry about all of this…”

“Don’t be.. Are those for me?..”

He nodded and let him see them, enjoying his smile one last time.

“They’re gorgeous. Thank you..”

“Of course. You’re dying.. It’s the least I can do.”

John smiled and turned towards him, taking a long last look at his face, then frowning. “Thomas.. Are you okay?..”

“My best friend’s dying.. Of course I’m not okay..”

“Not that.. I mean… You’re bleeding.” He reached up and wiped a drop of blood away from Thomas’s lips.

“Oh.. That…” He smiled softly. “Let’s just say, I’m seeing you soon. I’m bring you a rose.”

John frowned. “You too?..”

He nodded. “And there’s no way for me to get cured..” He took John’s hand, the gesture explaining his words. “So, I’ll see you soon..”

“No..” He squeezed his hand. “You won’t…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone interested in commissioning me for one shots can email me at slashgashotaku@gmail.com for details.


End file.
